Well, I guess that starting a new habit is even harder than I imagined it would be.

But I seem to get inspired to write after I read my buddy Idaho Rider. D is finding his own voice, and getting better at putting thoughts out there with nuance and meaning. I can only hope to get to that point. Of course my eternal ego says that I can do that with just a modicum of practice. (Must get that voice under control)

The Kiwi and I seem to be in an odd pattern; we commute into SpoVegas 2 or 3 days a week, bust ass at our J.O.B.S and imagine getting ahead. We spend about 14 hours a week in the car, laying out too much of our limited income supporting Exxon. Once home we prep dinner and eat while watching a movie from NetFlix, clean up and head to bed. I'ts not a bad routine, but I don't want us to just exist, I want us to LIVE! I love the girl too much to keep things mundane. I know what a killer living in a rut is to a relationship.

Money is always an issue for all couples. Hell it is an issue for everyone but the Gates and Murdochs in the world. I have put us behind in a big way by staying too long at a straight commission job that I just didn't have an aptitude for. I should have been socking away some kind of paycheck while studying for a degree or certification, even a real estate license would have helped. I was able to set a decent buisness plan for the Bike Shop and I stuck to it, but once I passed the time parameter for that plan, I just fell into the family habit of working hard while daydreaming.

There is a strange gene that seems to run through the males of my clan. It manifests itself in an earnest lust at "hitting it BIG" knocking down huge commissions, hitting the mother lode ore body, growing a New England pub to gigantic proportions, Winning the Lottery! We all seem to work hard and sort of smart, but there is always that underlying sensation that we are missing our potential.

I've been hearing that my entire life,"missing one's potential" what does it mean? Mom said she knew, but she never shared that knowledge. Pity.